Friday, 28 February 2020

Pagliacci




When I was a kid
I used to go to a small circus
In my village with my grandma
She couldn't afford any show in the tent
Except a cotton candy
And an act from a clown
That's all we got
"His name is Pagliacci," she said
Every kid around me was laughing at him
Over his face and witless acts.
Another day I came in
And watched him again
Inside a circle of people surrounding him,
He showed his acts to the world
Making funny jokes and silly faces
He ran around the circle,
Dancing with hands on the waist
Smiling on his mask
And he came at me for seconds
Said, "No, Pagliaccio non son, dear."
It's the closest distance ever between me and him
And I saw his ruffles, radiated sad eyes hid behind his mask
And then he went slowly, moved around,
Entertaining all the thirsty eyes -
Shouting, clapping, begging –
One more.
I didn't know exactly what feeling I felt that moment
But I stunned with my cotton candy on the right hand
As all the giggle blended in circus music were fading out.

***

Today I finally realize
As I grow up, the memory of him remain on my brain
Pagliacci is the symbol of how silly life could be -
The face you showcase;
The way you dress
All the thing people show to impress
It's all part of the circus
And the play we made
Behind every sadness and mess –
We're all Pagliacci.

- LR

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