Saturday, 8 June 2019

Today's Muse: Not Your Mother's Favorite


In a country where patriarchy plays exclusively well, the role of a woman sticks to the conventional way. The basic circle from school to getting married, fulfilling your parent or your spouse's parent's expectations in a young woman: feminine (not feminist) by solely upholding the traditional values that become the substantial judgment to what so-called "a good woman." Let's say, the most overused obligations as the good ones are being able to cook, staying at home whilst taking care of the children and the house, serving the husband well. There surely is nothing wrong with that, but it is when it becomes the limit for a woman who is about to chase her visions, making her stuck in her career and potential.

There are at least two impacts when the tradition becomes the barrier: underdeveloped emancipation, and opposition. The former indicates behavior that tries to mix the feminist concept to the old system but turns out to be failed. It causes the woman to eventually accept the fact that the tradition is too robust to be changed. Thus, sticking to the rules becomes the only choice taken even if the obedience is half-hearted as it blends in the woman's mindset which occasionally being practiced on her daily basis. As a consequence, it's what leads to the underdeveloped emancipation. The woman is lost to the system, tradition, and society that force directly or indirectly to be followed, but at the other times being unfollowed.

Meanwhile the former tends to show obedience, the latter presents absolutely the other way. Opposition makes the woman seem to be having a reckless behavior which is actually misunderstood by the society who commits substantially with the patriarchy system. Preceded by critical thinking toward the surroundings, the woman who is categorized to the opposition is finding the answers to her questions in a bid to fulfill the balance in her life. Sound egotistical? Maybe yes, probably nope. Unlike the first one, the woman here tends to be stubborn, unfollows the rules that limit her from achieving her purpose, seeks to find herself to be somebody she desires. She doesn't view the tradition with conventional values as the only choice instead she sees it as a challenge. She's doubtlessly a handful creation until she finds out why and how.

Not Your Mother's Favorite talks about the opposition - the woman who opposes, who against, who fights for her projections. I want to limit the scope of the women, solely those who tend to have an alpha male's traits. This type of women is inclined to have a prospective career, higher education as well as social occupation. For her, life is not simply graduating from school or college, then apply for any job or getting married. Life must go on with purpose. What to do and where to go begin with what is my passion, what I do really want to be, and eventually, what contribution I could make for the society? A bigger picture is put into her mind, thus she has visions to acquire, dreams to chase, plans to execute.

Amongst those all, hence - what is the problem?

It takes time to build an empire, so does it with her plans. Within the society with strong patriarchy system demands the women to follow the tradition as well as the rules. Getting married soon after graduation is still lucky, consider them who is forced by marrying the man she doesn't love under the age of seventeen - good heaven. The earth keeps rotating and nature is doing the revolution, why some traditions couldn't be changed? It sounds so unfair. The parent forces her daughter to get married when she wants to chase her dream first, and it becomes complicated since the opposition begins to play the role - she is now against her parent, the tradition, and the system.

Not intending to even break the norms but the voice inside says a different thing, what is wrong with her? A number of characteristics that she has are considered uncommon in most women, or even worse - assumed as having inappropriate traits for a woman. Oftentimes is debating; oftentimes is a misunderstanding. She cannot cook but she plays the Mozart, she cannot sew but she could have flown reaching the stars, she couldn't fulfill her parent's wish just to follow the rules, making her like a bad girl. Yet she is the queen bee who won't let anything pulls the reign while she is chasing her dreams. And that's unfortunately what makes her... not your mother's favorite.

Not Your Mother's Favorite
- Lista